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11 July 2006 @ 10:24 am
This is my last post. I'm leaving this journal. I'm going to start a new one that doesnt have her in it anywhere. I cant do this. I knew it was all my fault and it is. It fucking is. Bye guys.
angelz14228angelz14228 on July 11th, 2006 06:16 pm (UTC)
I added your new journal. I hope that you dont mind? I am sure that everything will work out. It may be hard right now, but you have precious kids that need you in there lifes. We(LJ friends) are here to offer you the best support that we can. Weither or not this someone will remain in your life is up to you! No one else but you. Some people may not like it, but tuff. You are your own woman. Things could be alot worse (doesnt seem like it at the moment). As a mom you know what i mean (at least i hope you do!). We are here for you!
piecesofmoipiecesofmoi on July 11th, 2006 06:21 pm (UTC)
Thanks, of course I'll add you :) I hate doing this but I know I have to right now, for my own sanity. Maybe when I'm whole again I can have her back as a friend, if its not too late, but right now I just cant do it. It hurts to much. Its like a constant reminder of how bad I fucked up and it kills me.
angelz14228angelz14228 on July 11th, 2006 06:37 pm (UTC)
I am not trying to sound mean here at all. But it cant be just your fault. There was two people! You have some part to blame and she does too! You shouldnt be putting yourself down like this. Maybe things were suppose to happen like this? There could be another "best friend" waiting out there for you who is 100% better and doesnt make you hurt.
You have to do whatever it is that is going to make you feel better inside. You have to take some "you" time. Figure out what you want. Right now you feel that you might need her, and you cant live without her. Just take some time relax, do what you enjoy most! You might find out that you are the one that doesnt want her back?!?!? Than she will be the one that is sorry for what she has done, and realize that it wasnt just you, it was her too.